$hoes

I hate purchasing shoes. They're expensive. Plus, if you really love them, you wear them out and then you have to buy new ones. What a cycle. Every morning I look at my feet and think here we go again. 
Anyway, I'm attempting to buy new shoes without spending money. No, it isn't working. But I've been checking on-line super sales and I came across this sillyness.

What is the point? Do the tops of your feet get really hot, so you have to air them out? Maybe this is just to counter the horrifying flip flop/sock combination. Needless to say, they're on sale.

 I just bought these instead:

Not. I better go to a store or raise my budget. It's true what they say, there's some scary stuff online.

Romantic comedy or the opening scene of Law and Order SVU?

Today the UPS man came to deliver my Amazon purchases and my neighbor's Amazon purchases. I got a knock on the door a few minutes later and my neighbor (Steve? I don't know) asked me if I had ordered printer toner and Pasta Roni. In fact, I had. I have a new printer, named Little Brother, that is not so little--it's meant for a small office and the toner box was rather large. I have a lot of articles to read for school, but I still think this makes me look a little strange...Well, the UPS guy mixed up our packages. As a side note, I suppose this means that the signature I made confirming the package was a complete hoax. As we exchanged boxes he said, "I'm glad you didn't open it--I might have been embarrassed" and then went back inside his apartment.

Whaaaaaa!? What. was. in. that. box?

It had to come from Amazon...wait, they have everything on Amazon. Also, isn't pasta roni and super-toner kind of embarrassing? I mean come on, I would never admit publicly that I "subscribe and save" for the cheesy goodness of white shell pasta roni every month or that I have a crush on my printer and thus only give it the best. What's more embarrassing than pasta roni and heavy duty toner? However, he gets an incredible amount of mail. Perhaps he's running a mail-order drug trafficking business.

Overall, I wish I'd been more on top of things and opened the box. Women's clothing, gay-dar, an ant farm? We'll never know. Wait, maybe he also ordered pasta roni and toner. I gotta write a script.

Bird spotting

I'm not a fan of birds. I had a nightmare that I came home from school and there was a giant Dr. Seuss-esque bird standing in my living room. It wasn't bright pink or green, as Dr. Seuss would have ordered though, in fact it was totally naked with just a blue neck. Maybe this is why I don't eat meat... I started to run away(in that can't-quite-move-because-I'm-dreaming way) but it just stayed about ten feet behind me cocking its head. Gahhhhhhh. I would never pursue art historical study about Venice...too many pigeons. Oddly, I'm not afraid of eagles or cranes or other bigger birds (except for that one in my apartment) mostly pigeons and crows around town. They're shifty.

This has a point, I swear. Michael and I took a little walk in my neighborhood near the river. We found a cool bridge (Michael's in a bridge phase) and this little guy:

And I wasn't even scared.

The rest of the weekend was mostly Michael writing a story about Lawrence Welk lovers Guy and Ralna (which has installed "I can't help falling in love with you" in my head permanently and me reading some intense authorship philosophy. As a side note, I think Guy is the oddest name, "Hey Guy..." We also went to the fairgrounds for a massive book sale. Books are nice, but the best part of the trip was watching the people who were going to the other events on the grounds. There was a knife show AND a model train show. Double win for Michael and Sarah. Really though, we saw old men in overalls--you know, Conductors--and a young girl in a cape buying her first sword. You can't beat Eugene, birds, books, trains and knives.

Just a little youtube on a Thursday night

I think Ellen is hilarious and apparently I think people being scared is too. I thought it was worth sharing. I think Dennis Quaid was my favorite, but Taylor Swift does hit the deck.

This video came up next--ah the danger of youtube. I've seen it before but it's pretty funny. "Dennis Quaid is here."

Anyway, thank you for joining me--solitary youtubing isn't as much fun.

Craigslist personals

So, Michael and I sometimes read the personals. This is mostly inspired by my mom who once told me how traumatizing the personal pages in SF are (hairy doctor seeks a good time...). The Eugene Weekly is pretty great, but today we checked out the Spokane Craigslist. Hey! Long distance is depressing--mocking others gets us through.

We really enjoyed these "missed connections:"

Last Friday I got on the number 90 bus. I was holding two backpacks. I didn't know where I was going. I'm not from here. The bus driver told me where I need to get off. You have brown hair, your lip is pierced on the right, you were wearing a long brown skirt, all earth tones. We made eye contact a few times. I guess that's not much of a missed connection, but I kept thinking I should go over and ask you what you were listening to. You drew a thin heart in the condensation on the window, I thought that was cute. You got off at the transit station and I missed my chance. I've been here a few weeks, and I'm leaving in a few more. You had the sweetest eyes I've seen in this town. It would be nice to hear from you. 

Talk about punctuation drama in the next one. Ellipses, zeugmas...

You had a pink iPhone... and... a beautiful smile.. We exchange a couple of glances back and forth.. did I sense a connection? 


Then the game took a turn. Michael found this entry with his street name. He's pretty sure that a 32 year old man spotted him while he walked around the neighborhood and is now pinning for him. That's what you get for waving, babe.

I also enjoy that one of the categories under FOR SALE is "kids and babies." I know, I know--it's cribs and such. But I'm going to keep checking it in case someone posts their child.

So, if you need to cheer up on this Saturday (like I did, since I'm in the library ALREADY), check out your local Craig's List personals.